Wild Dingo
25th December 2007, 02:43 AM
I was wombling around in the shed yesty couldnt find a thing to do... black dog day Im afraid... anyway I spied the lathe sittin there covered in a fine coating of dust so I ripped the Aussie flag that I use as a cover of her and she was just eyeing me off... and then she whispered "come on dipstick have a go yer mug yer know yer wanna go on just one"
Well with the mongrel black dog nippin at me heals I turned and walked away back to the workbench I went and sat and drank my now cold cuppa coffee had a fag and wandered around again... ended up back at the lathe... "come on!! you know yer wanna have a gander up there on the shelf theres that nice wee lump of sandlewood youve been saving... no? fine theres that last wee peice of huon sittin there go on such a sweet scent that has you know you wanna GO ON!! TURN ME ON BABY!!" but I turned and walked away...
I went down behind the shed to the first of my wood piles and had a bit of a sticky beak but no nothing I could see seemed to take me so I marched of up the back to the major pile of logs up there and wandered around... nah nothing grabbed me there either... so with head hung low and the black dog now chewing on me leg I wandered back to the door and there sittin beside the door was this nice sorta "round" lump of some sorta timber I had tossed there some months back for some reason or other... mmm... I lifted it up and took it inside and put it on the workbench
mmmm I turned it over then turned it over again... then I thought may as well do something... so I wandered over to the bandsaw and turned it on and started slicing the edges off to make it even more round... finally I got it close to where it looked roundish so I got out my straight edge and made some crosshairs to find the center finally I was reasonably content with my directional abilities to find the center of a sorta roundish lump of somewhere around 12in give or take several inches x 3in thick wood of some discription
So I hummed and haaaed for another fag and a bit more of the cold coffee... had a slurp of water from the bottle I leave out there for the veneering... yech!!!... gulped down the rest of the coffee and wandered over to the lathe "I knew you would come to me... come on big boy turn me on! GO ON!!!" I ignored her and faced the timber up to the center pins (forgotten the damned name now) and when I was happy with the roll of the lump by hand I made sure the stand thingy was out of the way and stepped to one side... "GO ON BABY HIT THAT BUTTON DO IT TO ME COME ON!!!" she screamed... so I pleased her
I flipped the button and turned the dial... SLOWLY... at 200rps she groaned she wobbled she was turned ON... so I sped it up a touch now at 400rpms an she was orgasming all over the shop!!... "MORE OOOHHH MORE!!" she screamed at me... hessitantly I turned the dial a little more at 800rpms I stood well back and to the side... she had lost all control of herself!! literally she was DANCING around the floor!! shaking rockin wobbling jiggling all over the place!!... I reached out "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! YOU TOUCH MY BUTTONS BOYO AND I WILL..." turn the dial and flip the switch down and off
breathe a sigh of deep relief as the bench slowly found its feet again the lathe relaxed back onto the top and the lump of timber finally stopped its insane banging and wobbling
I think I need to make a new more heavy duty type bench... I think?... either that or bolt it to the floor and walls!!
Soooo anyone have any idea of what a GOOD SOLID Lathe bench looks like? should I make one of timber or STEEL??? have welder can melt steel to steel sorta... what size steel should I use? I love my lathe an she loves me I just gotta make her stay put when I turn her on eh fiesty wee thing she is :;
I wasnt scared... much :C
Well with the mongrel black dog nippin at me heals I turned and walked away back to the workbench I went and sat and drank my now cold cuppa coffee had a fag and wandered around again... ended up back at the lathe... "come on!! you know yer wanna have a gander up there on the shelf theres that nice wee lump of sandlewood youve been saving... no? fine theres that last wee peice of huon sittin there go on such a sweet scent that has you know you wanna GO ON!! TURN ME ON BABY!!" but I turned and walked away...
I went down behind the shed to the first of my wood piles and had a bit of a sticky beak but no nothing I could see seemed to take me so I marched of up the back to the major pile of logs up there and wandered around... nah nothing grabbed me there either... so with head hung low and the black dog now chewing on me leg I wandered back to the door and there sittin beside the door was this nice sorta "round" lump of some sorta timber I had tossed there some months back for some reason or other... mmm... I lifted it up and took it inside and put it on the workbench
mmmm I turned it over then turned it over again... then I thought may as well do something... so I wandered over to the bandsaw and turned it on and started slicing the edges off to make it even more round... finally I got it close to where it looked roundish so I got out my straight edge and made some crosshairs to find the center finally I was reasonably content with my directional abilities to find the center of a sorta roundish lump of somewhere around 12in give or take several inches x 3in thick wood of some discription
So I hummed and haaaed for another fag and a bit more of the cold coffee... had a slurp of water from the bottle I leave out there for the veneering... yech!!!... gulped down the rest of the coffee and wandered over to the lathe "I knew you would come to me... come on big boy turn me on! GO ON!!!" I ignored her and faced the timber up to the center pins (forgotten the damned name now) and when I was happy with the roll of the lump by hand I made sure the stand thingy was out of the way and stepped to one side... "GO ON BABY HIT THAT BUTTON DO IT TO ME COME ON!!!" she screamed... so I pleased her
I flipped the button and turned the dial... SLOWLY... at 200rps she groaned she wobbled she was turned ON... so I sped it up a touch now at 400rpms an she was orgasming all over the shop!!... "MORE OOOHHH MORE!!" she screamed at me... hessitantly I turned the dial a little more at 800rpms I stood well back and to the side... she had lost all control of herself!! literally she was DANCING around the floor!! shaking rockin wobbling jiggling all over the place!!... I reached out "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! YOU TOUCH MY BUTTONS BOYO AND I WILL..." turn the dial and flip the switch down and off
breathe a sigh of deep relief as the bench slowly found its feet again the lathe relaxed back onto the top and the lump of timber finally stopped its insane banging and wobbling
I think I need to make a new more heavy duty type bench... I think?... either that or bolt it to the floor and walls!!
Soooo anyone have any idea of what a GOOD SOLID Lathe bench looks like? should I make one of timber or STEEL??? have welder can melt steel to steel sorta... what size steel should I use? I love my lathe an she loves me I just gotta make her stay put when I turn her on eh fiesty wee thing she is :;
I wasnt scared... much :C