Thread: Pilots & Air Traffic Controllers #1

Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, six miles."
Delta 351: Give us another hint. We have digital watches."

Tower: "TWA 234, for noise abatement, turn right 45 degrees."
TWA 2341: "We are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make
up here?"
Tower: "Have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits
a 727?"

From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue:
"I'm f**king bored!"
Tower: "Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately."
Unknown aircraft: "I said I was f**king bored, not f**king stupid."

O'Hare approach control to a 747: "United 329 heavy, your traffic
is a Fokker, one o'clock, three miles, eastbound."
United 329: "Approach, I've always wanted to say this.. I've
got the little Fokker in sight."

A student became lost during a solo cross-country flight.
While trying to locate the aircraft on radar, ATC asked: "What
was your last known position?"
Student: "When I was number one for takeoff."