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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Brisbane
    Posts
    5,773

    Default Why the chicken crossed the road.

    Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

    Pat Buchanan: To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.

    Louis Farrakhan: The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.

    Bill Gates: I have just released the new Chicken 2000, which will both cross roads AND balance your checkbook, though when it divides 3 by 2 it gets 1.4999999999.

    The Bible: And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the Chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

    Machiavelli: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The ends of crossing the road justify whatever motive there was.

    Freud: The fact that you thought that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

    L.A. Police Department: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.

    Richard M. Nixon: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did not cross the road.

    Saddam Hussein: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

    Saddam Hussein #2: It is the Mother of all Chickens.

    Dr. Seuss: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed it, I've not been told!

    Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken nature.

    Martin Luther King, Jr.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

    Joseph Stalin: I don't care. Catch it. I need its eggs to make my omelette.

    Carl Jung: The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at this historical juncture, and, therefore, synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being.

    Mulder: It was a government conspiracy. The truth IS out there!

    Scully: It was a simple bio-mechanical reflex that is commonly found in chickens.

    Darwin: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically dispositioned to cross roads.

    Darwin #2: It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.

    Jerry Seinfeld: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, "What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place anyway?"

    The Pope: That is only for God to know.

    Grandpa: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken had crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

    M.C.Escher: That depends on which plane of reality the chicken was on at the time.

    George Orwell: Because the government had fooled him into thinking that he was crossing the road of his own free will, when he was really only serving their interests.

    Colonel Sanders: I missed one?

    Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

    Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?

    Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.

    Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain.

    O.J.: It didn't. I was playing golf with it at the time.

    Sid vicious: because it was stapled to the duck.
    Any thing with sharp teeth eats meat.
    Most powertools have sharp teeth.
    People are made of meat.
    Abrasives can be just as dangerous as a blade.....and 10 times more painfull.

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  3. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 1999
    Location
    Westleigh, Sydney
    Age
    77
    Posts
    9,542

    Default

    Bill Clinton: I did not have sex with that chicken!
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  4. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    Port Pirie SA
    Age
    52
    Posts
    6,908

    Default

    John Howard: Make sure that chicken paid GST and all goverment fee's, there isnt a Chicken Union is there?
    Paul Keating: Its a crossing we had to have.
    Rove Mcmanus: What tha?
    ....................................................................

  5. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2000
    Location
    Drop Bear Capital of Gippsland (Lang Lang) Vic Australia
    Age
    74
    Posts
    6,518

    Default

    Joh: Chickens, my goodness gracious me yes if it wasn't for Queensland we wouldn't have chickens or roads for that matter, goodness me............
    Stupidity kills. Absolute stupidity kills absolutely.

  6. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Melbourne, South East Subs.
    Posts
    395

    Default

    Obi Wan Kenobi: "Do not underestimate the power of The Road".
    The perfect is the enemy of the good.

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Perth
    Posts
    96

    Default

    DD aged 4 1/2 - What chicken Crossed the road?????

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