Computer Security Scam

[_fly_]

Ask them how proud their parents and grandparents must be knowing that their child is a thief and scam artist.
They don't like that.
Or tell them that the court does not allow you to have internet access as part of your parole for killing 2 people on your last trip to India.

[BEKKY]

Had one the other day and as I was'nt doing much decided to play along, the computer was'nt even on at the time.
He asked a lot of questions and said to press certain keys, after giving him a lot of silly answers he said, "You're a liar you bloody idiot" and hung up.
Have fun leading them on,
Keith.

[smidsy]

I had one back in 2010, when he told me the windows problem speil I asked him how he knew I had windows, that I might have Mac or linux - he said "oh f*ck" and hung up.

[Mobyturns]

After receiving a few such calls one morning when on sick leave recovering from a significant illness I got to the point where I had enough. My wife had gone out for a short while, so I had to get up again to answer the phone and it was that pest again so I hung up.

About 10 minutes later another call so I gave the caller a blast. Then another 10 minutes or so the phone rang again and after getting out of my sick bed again I wasn't to happy but before I could say a thing this nice friendly female voice very quickly said "I'm not them." I had given her the blast and thankfully she had hung up before she had got the worst of it. Turned out she was from the Brisbane Hospital I had recently been in & was doing a routine follow up survey to check on my surgery progress etc.

[AlexS]

A referee's whistle works just fine.

[Bob38S]

Have said it before - probably very rude but "they" are using my phone and taking up my time etc.

If I have the time and or inclination - wind them up and or waste their time and dollars.

If they catch me at a bad time the I break into their spiel with 2 questions.

"Are you interested in travel?"

as most appear to young/overseas etc they answer "Yes" quite quickly

"Are you interested in sex?"

throws them a bit {by now they are well and truly out of their spiel} but have never had one answer "No"

Now the statement "Well then, why don't you F##k off."

Must admit not a usual part of my vocab but it seems to be the only term that is understood by these pests. Have only had to do it a few times a year as they must put me on their own do not call list.

[A Duke]

Had one the other day and as I was'nt doing much decided to play along, the computer was'nt even on at the time.
He asked a lot of questions and said to press certain keys, after giving him a lot of silly answers he said, "You're a liar you bloody idiot" and hung up.
Have fun leading them on,
Keith.

They must be learning some Australian answers at last, pity they don't do it instead of passing it on.

[smidsy]

What we need, and the technology is probably there, is a means to either opt out of, or ID (maybe through caller ID) incoming calls that originate from an IP phone since most of them use IP phones to call from India.

[rrich]

There is a thing here about generating electricity from solar energy.

It is not a scam but a PITA. So I play along.

The way that it works is that the panel installation is "free" (yeah, right) based upon not paying for electricity but using that money to pay the loan for the panels.

I take one of two attacks to waste as much of their time as possible.

The first one is into their spiel they ask, "How much is your electric power bill?" I answer that I don't pay for electricity. Then we go into the how can you do that / are you off the grid etc.? Finally I tell them that the landlord pays the bill.

The other attack is that we go through the place of installation for the panels. I don't have a carport. I'll ask if I need neighbors permission? No we're not in a Home Owner Association area. Why neighbors permission? Well they live above us. Usually again more disbelief. Then I'll tell them that we live in a condominium.

The real problem is that you're not going to stop the calls so you might have as much fun as possible with the idiots.

BTW - Here in the US we are allowed to have any name listed in the phone book and attached to our caller I/D. I use "None Xyzzy". Pronounced non-E' Zizzy. Some of you may recognize xyzzy as a very old 'magic word'.

[The Bleeder]

I used to get a lot of cold callers and scammers....now I let the Fax machine answer them. It's kind of fun listening to them talk to a squealing fax machine.

Not many ring back and them I'm off their list.

Everyone else knows my mobile number and my policy is 'no number no answer', 'don't know that number no answer'

Seems to work and I don't have any stress......that I know of.

[Sebastiaan56]

I haven't had one for a while. I asked the last one what the blue screen meant, kept her busy for about 15 minutes.

The one I keep getting at work is "now the NBN is in your area you need to replace your phone system" yeh right, NBN....

[Skew's_Girl]

How to make a scam artist their pants.

Them: Hello, I am Ciza, I'm calling from the IT Department of Windows--
Me: One moment please. [Hold the phone away from my mouth and make a couple clicks], can you say your name again for the record?"
Them: My name is Ciza, and I'm calling from the IT department of Windows because we have been receiving notifications that your computer has become infected and viruses are corrupting your system. I need you to--
Me: Ciza, I'm required by law to inform you that this call is being recorded and traced as part of an ongoing investigation by the Australian Security Intelligence Organisation. This number has been associated with Illegal Arms Dealing under the new International Anti Terrorism laws and thereby all incoming and outgoing calls WILL be THOROUGHLY investigated as part of the upcoming court case. You and any one associated with this number will be expected to --
[CLICK]

Never laughed so hard in my life. I've got a really great phone voice when I want to; I wonder if they started frantically packing or just hoped I was a spoof.

Skew has been a Sys Admin and I've been a programmer in Computer games so we love taking them for a ride. We especially love laying on the jargon "Are the messages coming in on Tcp-ip, Dhcp, SMTP or PCP? The router logs aren't showing any messages to 127.14 or 128.11 so you can't be receiving them directly? Just one second we'll double check the Bastion Gateway; you're probably registering the honeypot again."

[Ironwood]

A referee's whistle works just fine.

A loud whistle does indeed work. My Wife has put one beside the phone to use on these scumbags. They dont like it when they get a loud blast, in fact after 3 times they have stopped ringing our number.

[crowie]

How to make a scam artist their pants.

Them: Hello, I am Ciza, I'm calling from the IT Department of Windows--
Me: One moment please. [Hold the phone away from my mouth and make a couple clicks], can you say your name again for the record?"
Them: My name is Ciza, and I'm calling from the IT department of Windows because we have been receiving notifications that your computer has become infected and viruses are corrupting your system. I need you to--
Me: Ciza, I'm required by law to inform you that this call is being recorded and traced as part of an ongoing investigation by the Australian Security Intelligence Organisation. This number has been associated with Illegal Arms Dealing under the new International Anti Terrorism laws and thereby all incoming and outgoing calls WILL be THOROUGHLY investigated as part of the upcoming court case. You and any one associated with this number will be expected to --
[CLICK]

Never laughed so hard in my life. I've got a really great phone voice when I want to; I wonder if they started frantically packing or just hoped I was a spoof.

Skew has been a Sys Admin and I've been a programmer in Computer games so we love taking them for a ride. We especially love laying on the jargon "Are the messages coming in on Tcp-ip, Dhcp, SMTP or PCP? The router logs aren't showing any messages to 127.14 or 128.11 so you can't be receiving them directly? Just one second we'll double check the Bastion Gateway; you're probably registering the honeypot again."

This is excellent....well done similar to a programmer friends response....
They must be bombarding the Blue Mountains at present as I've had a 12 calls this past month...
I've taken to answering the phone with my grade 7 German, only remember a few words BUT the beeps come quick.....

[Burnsy]

Had one tonight, was reading on here whilst I strung him along, "press the windows ikon and R at the same time, what has happened" he says. "Naked ladies" I say, "there are naked ladies on my screen" he just kept on going, ignoring it, I kept him on the line for 5 minutes before I got bored and said "I'm bored now, F....off" and hung up.

The best ones are the ones that ring and say you have a problem with your windows. I always tell them "yeah I know they are very dirty can you send some around to clean them".