Daddles
28th March 2007, 11:19 PM
G'day, this is a blatant cut and paste from a cycling forum of a post by me. As you read it, you'll maybe understand why I didn't rewrite it. I put it up because it might offer a wee bit of harmless entertainment to some of you who, like me, enjoy life on two wheels (pedalling furiously, none of this stinky motorised stuff :D).
Word of warning - when your new bike gets to 1,100 km, take a rest for the next 100km - it's dangerous.
Yup, I put the Black Beast (my Trek520) down again ... a week after the last time :oo:
This time I did it properly. None of this woosey 'lay it into soft dirt' caper.
They are rebuilding a bridge here. The road through the roadworks goes from four lanes to one. A bike path takes off to one side right at the final narrowing.
It's dusk - that horrible grey light where my old eyes don't work too well and bike lights down help at all. Traffic is solid. I'm in the construction area, speed limit has dropped to 40 and I've just avoided being squeezed by two cars as lanes disappear, so I've wound my speed up - the computer showed a max of 35.1 km/hr afterwards and I'm damned sure that was the speed of the prang.
The final narrowing comes up. Cars piling up and pushing for a spot. I veer off the road, across a car park gutter crossover, lined up for the start of the bike path.
The bike disappears from under me.
WHAM - my left should hits the bitumen (tear in jersey)
WHAM - my face hits the bitumen
bounce and scrape and I slide to a halt.
Up on me feet. Quick stagger. Drag bike off road where it's holding up the traffic. Attractive brunette appears in front of me: "are you alright?"
Damned silly question as it turns out. Blood's pouring from my mouth, my nose, most fingers, my hands, both knees and my stomach. My front teeth feel as though someone's had a go at them with a rubber mallet and I can feel bits of tooth amongst the blood in my mouth (the tooth I chipped as a kid no longer looks lopsided).
About then, I started to shake a tad - well, you do that don't you. I'm looking over to where the prang started - I can't see a cause. The brunette's looking too "my husband rides a bike. What happened? I can't see any reason for it".
Another attractive lady appears (there's a hint here for bachelors :D). "I wish I'd had my video, it'd be good on Funniest Home Videos". A quick glance shows that she's white and shaking, so I don't take offence.
Now the bike. One brifter (brake and gear change combination lever) is pointing towards to other as if to blame it for the prang, a large scar up its side. The bar tape will need replacing. A scrape on a pedal and one quick release, and there's blood all over it so I've got to wash her now dammit. I was able to knock the brifter back onto place (none of allen keys fitted the bolt that holds it) and ride back to where I'd left the car. Pedals spin smoothly so there are no bent axles there (those horrid M324s that everyone complains about too :D). Brifter seems to work as well as ever. So it looks like the damage is cosmetic.
Gloves are a write off (glad I was wearing them) and the helmet doesn't have a mark on it.
Damage to me? There's a graze on the end of my nose which runs down my face to an amazingly enlarged top lip - I'd scare horses and small children. Grazes on both knees and a shin. Most fingers have bits out of them and there's a decent hole in the back of one hand. My tummy has a large graze on it (the benefits of my body shape - the gut protected the rest of me, bit like an airbag I suppose) Both wrists have been jarred rather badly and one heel doesn't want me to walk on it. All cleaned up nicely after some vigorous rubbing with Detol and cotton wool. I'm lucky, I bleed like blazes then scab very quickly so wounds tend to get flushed with blood then protected and infections are rare with me. Everything looks clean now.
So, I'll be able to mope around feeling sorry for myself now.
Man that was a big bang. I remember feeling the bitumen hit me in the face, then me lifting off and coming down again.
Oh, and the cause? Remember this was roadworks? Well, they'd sealed this bit of road, but not to final height. The gutter crossover was new and, of course, at the final height of the road, so there's a 1" step between the road surface and the edge of the concrete crossover. In the half light, I just couldn't see it and, if fact, still couldn't see it when I went back to look at it - I had to put my foot on the road to see that it was lower than the concrete. I hit that at a shallow angle at 35 km/hr. I take that as a good excuse for going down :wink:
Richard
Word of warning - when your new bike gets to 1,100 km, take a rest for the next 100km - it's dangerous.
Yup, I put the Black Beast (my Trek520) down again ... a week after the last time :oo:
This time I did it properly. None of this woosey 'lay it into soft dirt' caper.
They are rebuilding a bridge here. The road through the roadworks goes from four lanes to one. A bike path takes off to one side right at the final narrowing.
It's dusk - that horrible grey light where my old eyes don't work too well and bike lights down help at all. Traffic is solid. I'm in the construction area, speed limit has dropped to 40 and I've just avoided being squeezed by two cars as lanes disappear, so I've wound my speed up - the computer showed a max of 35.1 km/hr afterwards and I'm damned sure that was the speed of the prang.
The final narrowing comes up. Cars piling up and pushing for a spot. I veer off the road, across a car park gutter crossover, lined up for the start of the bike path.
The bike disappears from under me.
WHAM - my left should hits the bitumen (tear in jersey)
WHAM - my face hits the bitumen
bounce and scrape and I slide to a halt.
Up on me feet. Quick stagger. Drag bike off road where it's holding up the traffic. Attractive brunette appears in front of me: "are you alright?"
Damned silly question as it turns out. Blood's pouring from my mouth, my nose, most fingers, my hands, both knees and my stomach. My front teeth feel as though someone's had a go at them with a rubber mallet and I can feel bits of tooth amongst the blood in my mouth (the tooth I chipped as a kid no longer looks lopsided).
About then, I started to shake a tad - well, you do that don't you. I'm looking over to where the prang started - I can't see a cause. The brunette's looking too "my husband rides a bike. What happened? I can't see any reason for it".
Another attractive lady appears (there's a hint here for bachelors :D). "I wish I'd had my video, it'd be good on Funniest Home Videos". A quick glance shows that she's white and shaking, so I don't take offence.
Now the bike. One brifter (brake and gear change combination lever) is pointing towards to other as if to blame it for the prang, a large scar up its side. The bar tape will need replacing. A scrape on a pedal and one quick release, and there's blood all over it so I've got to wash her now dammit. I was able to knock the brifter back onto place (none of allen keys fitted the bolt that holds it) and ride back to where I'd left the car. Pedals spin smoothly so there are no bent axles there (those horrid M324s that everyone complains about too :D). Brifter seems to work as well as ever. So it looks like the damage is cosmetic.
Gloves are a write off (glad I was wearing them) and the helmet doesn't have a mark on it.
Damage to me? There's a graze on the end of my nose which runs down my face to an amazingly enlarged top lip - I'd scare horses and small children. Grazes on both knees and a shin. Most fingers have bits out of them and there's a decent hole in the back of one hand. My tummy has a large graze on it (the benefits of my body shape - the gut protected the rest of me, bit like an airbag I suppose) Both wrists have been jarred rather badly and one heel doesn't want me to walk on it. All cleaned up nicely after some vigorous rubbing with Detol and cotton wool. I'm lucky, I bleed like blazes then scab very quickly so wounds tend to get flushed with blood then protected and infections are rare with me. Everything looks clean now.
So, I'll be able to mope around feeling sorry for myself now.
Man that was a big bang. I remember feeling the bitumen hit me in the face, then me lifting off and coming down again.
Oh, and the cause? Remember this was roadworks? Well, they'd sealed this bit of road, but not to final height. The gutter crossover was new and, of course, at the final height of the road, so there's a 1" step between the road surface and the edge of the concrete crossover. In the half light, I just couldn't see it and, if fact, still couldn't see it when I went back to look at it - I had to put my foot on the road to see that it was lower than the concrete. I hit that at a shallow angle at 35 km/hr. I take that as a good excuse for going down :wink:
Richard