Thanks Thanks:  0
Likes Likes:  0
Needs Pictures Needs Pictures:  0
Picture(s) thanks Picture(s) thanks:  0
Results 1 to 2 of 2

Thread: Army

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Pascoe Vale Vic
    Posts
    116

    Default Army

    the Australian Army

    Dear Mum & Dad

    I am well. Hope youse are too. Tell me big brothers Doug and Phil that the Army is better than workin' on the farm - tell them to get in bloody quick smart before the jobs are all gone!

    I wuz a bit slow in settling down at first, because ya don't hafta get outta bed until 6am. But I like sleeping in now, cuz all yagotta do before brekky is make ya bed and shine ya boots and clean ya uniform. No bloody cows to milk, no calves to feed, no feed to stack - nothin'!! Ya haz gotta shower though, but its not so bad, coz there's lotsa hot water and even a light to see what ya doing!

    At brekky ya get cereal, fruit and eggs but there's no kangaroo steaks or possum stew like wot Mum makes. You don't get fed again until noon and by that time all the city boys are buggered because we've been on a 'route march' - geez its only just like walking to the windmill in the back paddock!!

    This one will kill me brothers Doug and Phil with laughter. I keep getting medals for shootin' - dunno why. The bullseye is as big as a bloody possum's bum and it don't move and it's not firing back at ya like the Johnsons did when our big scrubber bull got into their prize cows before the Ekka last year! All ya gotta do is make yourself comfortable and hit the target - it's a piece of !! You don't even load your own cartridges they comes in little boxes and ya don't have to steady yourself against the rollbar of the roo shooting truck when you reload!

    Sometimes ya gotta wrestle with the city boys and I gotta be real careful coz they break easy - it's not like fighting with Doug and Phil and Jack and Boori and Steve and Muzza all at once like we do at home after the muster.

    Turns out I'm not a bad boxer either and it looks like I'm the best the platoon's got, and I've only been beaten by this one bloke from the Engineers - he's 6 foot 5 and 15 stone and three pick handles across the shoulders and as ya know I'm only 5 foot 7 and eight stone wringin' wet, but I fought him till the other blokes carried me off to the boozer.

    I can't complain about the Army - tell the boys to get in quick before word gets around how bloody good it is.

    Your loving daughter,
    Sheila

    Allan
    Last edited by Elbow; 28th March 2008 at 08:51 AM. Reason: remove font information
    Gunner

  2. # ADS
    Google Adsense Advertisement
    Join Date
    Always
    Location
    Advertising world
    Posts
    Many





     
  3. #2
    Calm's Avatar
    Calm is offline Stubby Owner and proud of it. Now coming back to Earth.:D
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    Niddrie, Victoria
    Age
    67
    Posts
    2,264

    Default

    Yep them cow girls are bred tuff
    regards

    David


    "Tell him he's dreamin."
    "How's the serenity" (from "The Castle")

Similar Threads

  1. the aussie army
    By ele__13 in forum WOODIES JOKES
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 11th March 2006, 08:01 PM
  2. Army retirement
    By Baz in forum WOODIES JOKES
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 5th February 2006, 07:46 PM
  3. Join the Army
    By DonN in forum WOODIES JOKES
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 6th January 2005, 08:22 PM
  4. Army
    By Baz in forum WOODIES JOKES
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 18th April 2004, 10:33 AM
  5. The Army (2)
    By Iain in forum WOODIES JOKES
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 19th September 2000, 12:21 AM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •