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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    207

    Default Colonoscopy comments

    The following comments were allegedly made to a US doctor by patients undergoing colonoscopies -

    1. "Take it easy Doc, you're boldly going where no man has gone before."

    2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"

    3. "Can you hear me NOW?"

    4. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

    5. "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married."

    6. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"

    7. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out..."

    8. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"

    9. "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit."

    10. "Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."

    11. "You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"

    12. "God, now I know why I'm not gay."

    13. "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?"

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  3. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Sydney
    Age
    63
    Posts
    1,619

    Default



  4. #3
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Pakenham, outer Melb SE suburb, Vic
    Age
    54
    Posts
    4,158

    Default

    After the Doc said "time for a quick update"


    The beatings will continue until morale improves.

  5. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Singleton NSW
    Age
    69
    Posts
    355

    Default

    I had both a Colonoscopy and Gastroscopy on one trip to hospital.

    I warned he doctor to do the front end first and then the backend - If he tried it the other way round and tried to put it in my mouth after it had been 'up there' he'd sure have a fight on his hands!!

    woodcutta

  6. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    207

    Default Colonoscophy

    WC, that's the test doctors use to see if you are suffering from a weak stomach.

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Nicholls ACT
    Posts
    728

    Default

    Just remember to count the hands on your shoulders

  8. #7
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Newcastle
    Age
    72
    Posts
    3,363

    Default

    Worst thing about having a Colonoscopy bag is getting the shoes to match.
    Ashore




    The trouble with life is there's no background music.

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