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  1. 30th May 2005, 08:53 PM #1
    Phil Spencer's Avatar
    Phil Spencer
    Phil Spencer is offline FIG Woodworks, Gentleman Woodworker
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    Default How to speak New Zealand

    How to speak New Zealand



    say out loud for full effect!






    Milburn - capital of Victoria






    Peck - to fill a suitcase






    ****** aside - chemical which kills insects






    Pigs - for hanging out washing with






    Pump - to act as agent for prostitute






    Pug - large animal with a curly tail






    Nin tin dough - computer game






    Munner stroney - soup






    Min - male of the species






    Mess Kara - eye makeup






    McKennock - person who fixes cars






    Mere - Mayor






    Leather - foam produced from soap






    Lift - departed






    Kiri Pecker - famous Australian businessman






    Kittle crusps - potato chips






    Ken's - Cairns






    Jumbo - pet name for someone called Jim






    Jungle Bills - Christmas carol






    Inner me - enemy






    Guess - vapour






    Fush - marine creatures






    Fitter cheney - type of pasta






    Ever cardeau - avocado






    Fear hear - blonde






    Ear - mix of nitrogen and oxygen






    Ear roebucks - exercise at the gym






    Duffy cult - not easy






    Amejen - visualise






    Day old chuck - very young poultry






    Bug hut - popular recording






    Bun button - been bitten by insect






    Beard - a place to sleep






    Sucks Peck - Half a dozen beers






    Ear New Zulland - an extinct airline






    Beers - large savage animals found in U.S. forests






    Veerjun - mythical New Zealand maiden






    One Doze - well known computer program






    Brudge - structure spanning a stream






    Sex - one less than sivven






    Tin - one more than nine






    Iggs Ecktly - Precisely






    Earplane - large flying machine






    Beggage Chucken - place to leave your suitcase at the earport






    Sivven Sucks Sivven - large Boeing aircraft






    Sivven Four Sivven - larger Boeing aircraft






    Cuds - children






    Pits - domestic animals






    Cuttin - baby cat






    Munce - usually served on toast

    Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I´m not so sure about the universe.

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  3. 30th May 2005, 09:03 PM #2
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    Tears of laughter, thank you mate. That was choice bro.
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  4. 30th May 2005, 09:10 PM #3
    Phil Spencer's Avatar
    Phil Spencer
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    Quote Originally Posted by boban


    Tears of laughter, thank you mate. That was choice bro.
    Most of my jokes won't let on they are too blue.
    Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I´m not so sure about the universe.

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  5. 30th May 2005, 09:16 PM #4
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    You've left out the other important one: the famous NZ horse that came over to Oz, won a lot of races and then went to the US and died.

    The Kiwi that brought him to Oz had a really strong InZid accent. He told the bloke who bought him that the horse's name was Philip. The Aussie thenceforth called the horse Phar Lap.
    Driver of the Forums
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  6. 30th May 2005, 09:19 PM #5
    Phil Spencer's Avatar
    Phil Spencer
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    Quote Originally Posted by Driver
    You've left out the other important one: the famous NZ horse that came over to Oz, won a lot of races and then went to the US and died.

    The Kiwi that brought him to Oz had a really strong InZid accent. He told the bloke who bought him that the horse's name was Philip. The Aussie thenceforth called the horse Phar Lap.
    LOL
    Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I´m not so sure about the universe.

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  7. 31st May 2005, 02:39 AM #6
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    See if you cun wurk thez oit mot.

    Zubaree dobal ur ix
    Buttol ov zurss mot

    Watch the Hi octane vids and you will guess them(sorry... gusz'em).
    ....................................................................
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  8. 31st May 2005, 02:50 AM #7
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    tin cints - coin worth a dina
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  9. 31st May 2005, 09:08 AM #8
    Phil Spencer's Avatar
    Phil Spencer
    Phil Spencer is offline FIG Woodworks, Gentleman Woodworker
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    Quote Originally Posted by Harry72
    See if you cun wurk thez oit mot.

    Zubaree dobal ur ix
    Buttol ov zurss mot

    Watch the Hi octane vids and you will guess them(sorry... gusz'em).
    ?
    Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I´m not so sure about the universe.

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  10. 31st May 2005, 09:42 AM #9
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    Geez Phil


    You've just made me homesick. Bin here 20+ years and still muss the griien griien griss of hame.

    Cheers
    RufflyRustic
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  11. 31st May 2005, 01:29 PM #10
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    One gumboot is a Ewe Boot???
    Stupidity kills. Absolute stupidity kills absolutely.
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  12. 31st May 2005, 03:21 PM #11
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    I attended a conference years ago where the guest speaker stood up and, in his introduction, welcomed all the NZ attendees. Then he pointed out he was married to a Kiwi and used to struggle with her accent until one day the answer dawned on him - Kiwis only have four vowells - e, e, e and e

    Cheers
    Richard
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  13. 31st May 2005, 10:47 PM #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Phil Spencer
    ?
    Zubaree dobal ur ix - Subaru WRX
    Buttol ov zurss mot - Bottle of sauce mate(as pass it over here)
    ....................................................................
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  14. 12th July 2005, 03:45 AM #13
    wolfman
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    Pussed me punts liffen!






    Dave
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  15. 12th July 2005, 11:49 AM #14
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    Q: What's a Hindu?

    A: Lies iggs, bro.
    Driver of the Forums
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  16. 12th July 2005, 12:33 PM #15
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    So, honey, how would you like it ?

    sucks please

    :confused: :confused: ...oh.... righto,,,,,$20 bucks thanks, seems hardly worth my while though......shore you don't won't the works, just cost ya another hundred ?

    yeh,,,,,,, sucks please....

    :confused: :confused:
    Last edited by JDarvall; 12th July 2005 at 02:49 PM.
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