Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 20
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Bottom of the leg
    Age
    78
    Posts
    822

    Default Duz tha speak Yorkshire

    A Yorkshire man takes his cat to the vet.

    Yorkshireman: "Ayup, lad, I need to talk to thee about me cat."

    Vet: "Is it a tom?"

    Yorkshireman: "Nay, I've browt it with us."
    .............................................................................

    A Yorkshireman's dog dies and as it was a favourite pet he decides to have a gold statue made by a jeweller to remember the dog by.

    Yorkshireman: "Can tha mek us a gold statue of yon dog?"

    Jeweller: "Do you want it 18 carat?"

    Yorkshireman: "No I want it chewin' a bone yer daft bugger!"

    .............................................................................
    A Yorkshireman's wife dies and the widower decides that her headstone should have the words "She were thine" engraved on it.
    He calls the stone mason, who assures him that the headstone will be ready a few days after the funeral.
    True to his word the stone mason calls the widower to say that the headstone is ready and would he like to come and have a look..

    When the widower gets there he takes one look at the stone to see that it's been engraved "She were thin".

    He explodes: "'ells bells man, you've left the blood y "e" out, you've left the blood y "e" out!"

    The stone mason apologises profusely and assures the poor widower that it will be rectified the following morning.

    Next day comes and the widower returns to the stone mason: "There you go sir, I've put the "e" on the stone for you".

    The widower looks at the stone and then reads out aloud:

    "E, she were thin".

    .............................................................................

    Bloke from Barnsley with piles asks chemist "Nah then lad, does tha sell ar_e cream?"

    Chemist replies "Aye, Magnum or Cornetto?"
    Cheers Fred



    The difference between light and hard is that you can sleep with the light on.
    http://www.redbubble.com/people/fredsmi ... t_creative"

    Updated 26 April 2010
    http://sites.google.com/site/pomfred/

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Cranbourne West
    Age
    67
    Posts
    3,514

    Default

    All good, but I particularly liked the headstone one.
    To grow old is inevitable.... To grow up is optional

    Confidence, the feeling you have before you fully understand the situation.

    What could possibly go wrong.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Northern Sydney
    Age
    44
    Posts
    2,764

    Default

    took me a while on some of them. Agreed about the headstone

    Cheers,
    Dave

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    North Of The Boarder
    Age
    63
    Posts
    16,754

    Default



    Fred top marks liked em awl

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    texas, queensland
    Posts
    1,233

    Default

    funny to me i was born there.
    'If the enemy is in range, so are you.'

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    Millmerran,QLD
    Age
    69
    Posts
    7,414

    Default

    I know of someone, I think his real name is Adrian, but as he came from yorkshire and followed the traditional greeting of "Ayup," all his workmates nicknamed him, you've guessed it, "Ayup."

    However this greeting is a little infectious and they started to adopt it amongst themselves. When they greeted Adrian, of course, it became,

    "Ayup, Ayup!"

    Regards
    Paul
    Bushmiller;

    "Power tends to corrupt. Absolute power corrupts, absolutely!"

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    texas, queensland
    Posts
    1,233

    Default

    after yorkshire we moved to just outside london ( stevenage ) and instead of "ayup " the greeting is " watcha "
    'If the enemy is in range, so are you.'

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    Millmerran,QLD
    Age
    69
    Posts
    7,414

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by texx View Post
    after yorkshire we moved to just outside london ( stevenage ) and instead of "ayup " the greeting is " watcha "
    Texx

    Oh the nostalgia.

    Regards
    Paul
    Bushmiller;

    "Power tends to corrupt. Absolute power corrupts, absolutely!"

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    Seven Hills, NSW
    Posts
    128

    Default

    Here's a Londoner who grew up with the spelling "Wotcher". Sometimes got the response "Why? What's she doing?"

    - Michael

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    Millmerran,QLD
    Age
    69
    Posts
    7,414

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ToothFairy View Post
    Here's a Londoner who grew up with the spelling "Wotcher". Sometimes got the response "Why? What's she doing?"

    - Michael
    I think "Wotcher" might be pretty universal, although I don't know how it is spelt.

    It reminds me; "Jamaica?" No did it by herself

    Regards
    Paul
    Bushmiller;

    "Power tends to corrupt. Absolute power corrupts, absolutely!"

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Nov 2019
    Location
    West Yorkshire UK
    Age
    81
    Posts
    1

    Default

    Lol

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Littlehampton, SA
    Posts
    125

    Default

    I taught with a guy who was on a one-year teacher exchange from Yorkshire, teaching Physical Education. One day he came into the PE office and asked "Where's Eric?" When met with numerous denials of knowing "Eric", he kept asking "No, where's Eric?" After quite a bit of questioning from other staff about Eric, no-one of that name being at the school, he finally said, "You know; Eric to rek the long jump pit!!!"

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Huntington Beach, CA USA
    Age
    77
    Posts
    1,766

    Default

    The only Duz I kow is what my mother used:

    Duz.jpg
    Rich

    When SWMBO said "I won't cook in metric."
    The metric system died in the US.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Location
    Murray Bridge SA
    Age
    67
    Posts
    3,280

    Default

    Apparently years ago, the OMO packet used to sit on the laundry window sill, letting the milkman/baker know the the Husband was out, Old Man Out. Occasionally it was known for the packet to be turned upside down, letting the lady next door know the wife was out, Old Woman Out.
    Kryn
    To grow old is mandatory, growing up is optional.

  15. #15
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Woodstock (Cowra)
    Age
    70
    Posts
    2,423

    Default

    You had to dig deep for that one Kyn
    The person who never made a mistake never made anything

    Cheers
    Ray

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Yorkshire baby
    By BazzaDLB in forum WOODIES JOKES
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 17th Jan 2008, 09:44 PM
  2. Yorkshire Radiator Covers
    By trooperbill in forum Links to: WEB SITES
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 16th Nov 2004, 08:59 AM
  3. speak to me like im a 2 yr old
    By WISE in forum ROUTING FORUM
    Replies: 25
    Last Post: 29th Jun 2004, 10:09 PM
  4. Eh.... ??? Speak up!
    By Zed in forum WOODWORK - GENERAL
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 8th Apr 2004, 09:48 AM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •