Thread: Frank Feldman

A man walks into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He gets in and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank."

Passenger: "Who?"

Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things like that happened to Frank Feldman every single time."

Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everyone."

Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."

Passenger: "Sounds like he was someone special."

Cabbie, "There's more...he has a memory like a computer, could remember everyone's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything, not like me. I fix a fuse and the whole district blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he could do everything right."

Passenger: "Wow, some guy then."

Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go through traffic and avoid traffic jambs. Not like me, I always get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even when she was in the wrong; and his clothing was immaculate, shoes highly polished too....he was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."

Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"

Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank. I just married his ****** widow."