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  1. 15th July 2006, 09:52 AM #1
    rrich Guest

    Default Wood related and a GROANER

    Paraphrasing an old joke about an Outback Survival Kit and The Perfect Martini.

    The Woodworkers Outback Survival Kit.

    Contents
    One plate of glass, 10MM thick and about 305MM square
    Various and sundry sheets of WoD sandpaper up to 6000 grit
    3M #77 spray glue
    Various water stones up to 8000 grit
    Slow speed water cooled grinding wheel with accessories
    Protractor
    8X Lupe
    Instruction manual, "Achieving a Perfectly Sharp Chisle"
    Small folding table
    One dull chisle

    Instructions for use
    Should you ever become lost or disoriented in the Outback, set up the table, referr to the instruction manual and begin to sharpen the chisel.

    Within minutes, 87 well meaning souls will materize out of thin air and explain the correct method for sharpening a chisel.

    Any of these 87 people can then lead you out of the Outback.
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  3. 15th July 2006, 12:56 PM #2
    Carry Pine
    Carry Pine is offline GOLD MEMBER
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    How true!!!

    Carry Pine
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  4. 15th July 2006, 05:20 PM #3
    Skew ChiDAMN!!'s Avatar
    Skew ChiDAMN!!
    Skew ChiDAMN!! is offline Dances with splinters
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    Just don't ask the ones who keep sniggering... they'll lead you a merry chase.
    I may be weird, but I'm saving up to become eccentric.

    - Andy Mc
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  5. 16th July 2006, 09:36 PM #4
    Carry Pine
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    And the follow up riddle is: If you are stranded in the outback what is the quickest way to get a woman's attention?
    Answer will be posted in 24 hrs.
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  6. 17th July 2006, 04:12 AM #5
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    outback
    outback is offline Wood Wrecker
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    If I find myself stranded in some desert, I DON'T want you buggers disttracting my attention. OK
    Boring signature time again!
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  7. 17th July 2006, 06:37 PM #6
    Carry Pine
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    Like the first riddle: Take a tub of water and prepare to wash some plates and glasses. Guaranteed to attract a woman's advice. And if you are really desperate for female attention, start washing the plates first.
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