Super IQ's (whatever that means)

**Iain** · 13th August 2006, 05:23 PM

Who said AFL players weren't smart.........

"Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein." Mick Malthouse - Collingwood

"I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes." Peter Bell - Fremantle - on his University Law studies

"You guys line up alphabetically by height." and "You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle." Barry Hall Sydney Captain at training

Brock Maclean (Melbourne) on whether he had visited the Pyramids during his visit to Egypt: "I can't really remember the names of the clubs that we went to."

"He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is." Kevin Sheedy on James Hird

Jonathan Brown, on night Grand Finals vs Day Games "It's basically the same, just darker."

Ron Barassi talking about Gary Cowton "I told him, 'Son, what is it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, Barass, I don't know and I don't care.'

Barry Hall (Sydney) when asked about the upcoming season: "I want to kick 70 or 80 goals this season, whichever comes first."

"Luke Hodge - the 21 year old, who turned 22 a few weeks ago" (Dermott Brereton).

"Chad had done a bit of mental arithmetic with a calculator." (Mark Williams)

"We actually got the winning goal three minutes from the end but then they scored." (Ben Cousins, West Coast Eagles)

"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body." (Luke Darcy).

"That kick was absolutely unique, except for the one before it which was identical." (Dermott Brereton)

"I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father." (Shane Wakelin)

"Sure there have been injuries and deaths in football - but none of them serious." (Adrian Anderson)

"If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again."(Andrew Demetriou)

"I would not say he (Chris Judd) is the best centreman in the AFL, but there are none better." (Dermott Brereton)

"I never comment on umpires and I'm not going to break the habit of a lifetime for that prat." (Terry Wallace)

Garry Lyon: "Have you ever thought of writing your autobiography?" David Swartz: "On what?"

"Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw."(Dermott Brereton)

"Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer."(Dermott Brereton)

**echnidna** · 13th August 2006, 06:19 PM

So yer have a higher iq if yer don't play footy?

**AlexS** · 13th August 2006, 06:23 PM

"We're sick of having sex shoved down our throats on TV" Rex Mossop (AKA Rocks Messup), former Rugby League player and commentator.

**Iain** · 13th August 2006, 06:30 PM

Alex, a dumbass feminile I work with occassionally responded to my request for a refill for a machine that was empty, 'Is it fully empty?'

She is at Uni doing a degree in womens issues, whatever that means.

**ernknot** · 13th August 2006, 07:27 PM

Originally Posted by Iain

Alex, a dumbass feminile I work with occassionally responded to my request for a refill for a machine that was empty, 'Is it fully empty?'

She is at Uni doing a degree in womens issues, whatever that means.

Probably " How to train blonds"

**ozwinner** · 13th August 2006, 07:51 PM

Originally Posted by Iain

She is at Uni doing a degree in womens issues, whatever that means.

Dishwashing
Ironing
Sweeping.

Al

**Cliff Rogers** · 13th August 2006, 08:36 PM

Originally Posted by Iain

...a dumbass feminile I work ..responded .., 'Is it fully empty?'.....

that's fully sic.

Iain, yur way old.

**Driver** · 13th August 2006, 08:38 PM

David Coleman, the BBC Television sports commentator

About Asa Hartford, a footballer who was born with a hole in the heart

"Here he is, that whole-hearted player: Asa Hartford!"

Commentating at the Olympics

"...And the great Cuban 400-metre runner: Juantorena, only has to open his legs to show us his class!"

And on several different occasions

"Football is a game of two halves!"

"This is now a whole different ball game!" (It wasn't, by the way: same teams, same code, same pitch etc).

The man is a legend.

Unlike Ron Atkinson a First Division manager at the time, on a television sports programme with Kevin Keegan, then Liverpool and England's main striker. They were commenting on a match in the 1970s.

Atkinson: "These black players, they've got no bottle. They'll never be any good."

Keegan: "Are you sure?"

Atkinson: "Go on, name me one good black player. One black player who's any good at all. Just one. Go on!"

Keegan: "Ever heard of a fella called Pele?"

**craigb** · 13th August 2006, 08:48 PM

Originally Posted by AlexS

"We're sick of having sex shoved down our throats on TV" Rex Mossop (AKA Rocks Messup), former Rugby League player and commentator.

Minor correction there Alex.

What happened was Rexie used to (still does? :confused: ) live above Reef Beach on Sydney Harbour which was one of the first nude beaches in Sydney back in the '70's.

Anyway, one day Rex, getting sick of the "lurkers"

in the bushes affected a citizen's arrest of one of them. When subsequently talking to the media about it he offered the classic quote: "I've got nothing against people's genitals, I just don't want them shoved down my throat" :eek:

**AlexS** · 13th August 2006, 10:16 PM

I stand corrected. It's even more effective when accurately quoted.

**silentC** · 14th August 2006, 10:27 AM

I like to make double entendres out of nothing. Call it a bit of fun, call it immaturity, whatever, it annoys the hell out of people.

My old man bought himself a Karcher yesterday. As he wandered off to bed last night, he exclaimed "I'm going to give my pressure cleaner a burl tomorrow". I said "is that what you call it?" He said "yes, it's got a 10 metre hose". I said "you're just bragging now." See, it's easy and endless fun for all the family.

**Rookie** · 14th August 2006, 06:39 PM

Anyway, one day Rex, getting sick of the "lurkers"

in the bushes affected a citizen's arrest of one of them. When subsequently talking to the media about it he offered the classic quote: "I've got nothing against people's genitals, I just don't want them shoved down my throat"

Bugger. And I always thought that quote was by Fred Nile when he was commenting on the Gay Mardi Gras.

Gettin' too old and forgettin' stuff.

**Eddie Jones** · 14th August 2006, 07:28 PM

Probably a bit off-topic, but bugger it.

The best commentator type comment I remember was during a West Indies v England test a few years back. Interviewed later, the guy (wish I could remember his name) said he had waited for ages to say it. The poms were in a tight spot, only the bowlers left etc etc, when the comment came:

"And the the bowlers holding the batsmans willie"

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