A clearly inebriated woman, stark naked, jumped into a taxi in New York City and laid on the back seat.

The cab driver, an old gentleman, opened his eyes wide and stared at the woman.
He made no attempt to start the cab. The woman glared back at him and said,
"What's wrong with you, honey? Haven't you ever seen a naked woman before?"

The old driver answered, "Let me tell you sumting, lady. I vasn't staring at you like you tink; dat vould not be proper."

The woman giggled and responded, "Well, if you're not staring at my boobs or my butt, sweetie, what are you doing then?"

He paused a moment, then told her, "Vell..... M'am, I am looking and I am looking, and I am tinking to myself, vair in da hell is dis lady keeping de money to pay for dis ride?"