Thread: Poets corner.............

A tale of woe...or maybe it's woof not sure where it came from but anyway...

Pete knew a girl named Mary Lou
People told him she knew just what to do
He asked her out on a Friday night
Woke up Saturday with a fright

His bum was tender
His head a little groggy
He looked for Mary
But only found a doggy

He got out of bed
Walking like a horseman
Then spotted Mary
Dressed like a Norseman

On closer inspection
Marys beard was obvious
He must of been so p1ssed
He'd not been cautious

The dog opened an eye
As Pete tried to leave
The dogs canines were bared
As he leapt with a heave

..........feel free to add a verse...

The dog leapt for his throat
But misjudged the attack
And clamped onto his scrote(?)
Forcing him onto his back

The dog showed no mercy
While enjoying Pete’s plight
Mary shouted ’No Percy’
I want him tonight…………..

(Oh sweet ecstasy )

A dog that wants to shag a bloke
is certainly a bloody joke.
What position would he use
to cause such canine human abuse.
I know that many of you would say,
"Doggy fashion is Ok"
I can not continue in this forum
because we must maintain decorum.

Christmas time is almost here
It comes but once per year
Tis time to have some cheer
Maybe drink some more beer
Christmas time Ive come to hate
Money is all I seem to relate
Spend spend spend
There seems to be no end
As a child I used to wait
But all I do know is hate.
So many people at their end
So much money they do spend
Happyness they hope to buy
All their money say goobye

Sorry.

Al

PS. I realy do hate Christmas

Tis the season to be jolly
only if you have the lolly.
Buying presents is a trap
all you end up is with crap.
Stuff you buy is bright and shiny
when in fact its and briney.
All the shops are open late
just to get your dollars mate.
Buy your presents during the year
this makes the cost easier to bear.
Of Christmas cheer I am a fan
especially if its in a can.
Bah! Hummbug! is still true
if you want to avoid the commercial screw!
Merry Christmas to all

So Santas almost here
time for a few more beers
In the morn I will rise
just in time to get a suprise
I hinted all year long
Oh, bugger she got me a thong
maybe all is not lost
cause shes going to wear it.................whahaaaayyyyy

Al

Close your eyes and think of Oz
His Jockstrap on, and signed it was
By some cricket player of the past
She thought that it would be a blast
If his sweat could mingle with the star's
and poetry would come to pass
on Christmas day and evermore
Oz's grin would tell the score.

It's not the getting say they all
but giving is where blessings fall
Oz got a thong, and she in turn
not knowing that her ears would burn
'cos on the web around the land
her promises he'd broadcast grand
Their love still more than a glowing ember
This Christmas always she'll remember!!!

Merry Christmas Oz (and Mrs Oz!!)



P

The jolly season has gone past
We had our fill up to the brim
Now the time has come to fast
Work now starts on getting trim

Poets corner is in bad nick
I believe it's had the dick.
If you feel this is not so
give the poets corner a go.
Put together words that rhyme
and a poem will be formed in time.

Ern Knot
lost the plot?
that was grot
but hit the spot
thats my lot


Sorry, but couldn't leave that one alone

Roses are Red
Violets are Blue
We use no nails
Only Glue