Thread: Trans Siberian Adventure

......Humphrey Hamster stamped his foot in anger as he left the story...........Mumbling about sending MF here............

Would life imitate art they thought, because surely this thread, if it went the way of most others, would be considered art in the fullness of time.

And they would have plenty of that, (time) as the next 10,000 miles of their journey unfolded.

10,000 miles without an internet connection.

The whistle blew, and the iron horse lurched forward, then stopped just as suddenly as it had moved....

because of a flat tyre. The train was one of the new fangled ...

As soon as Tiers are Us, had fixed the flat tyre they were on their way again.......

The train had barely begun to move when Miss Marples noticed a pair of flying insects in their cabin.

So tiny, they could barely be seen, but even with her naked eye (that's the only naked bit so far in the story) she could see that they were well tanned...

They looked strangely out of place so far inland, clearly these were coastal insects!

Of course being Well Tanned they were from Vietnam, but how did the come to be on this train, hmmmmmm...........................

Alas, that's what happens when you let a Crapatorium Proprietor get involved in Taxonomy, your common garden variety Vietnamese Midges get mixed up with the much more rarified Sunny Coast variety!

Still the question was valid, and they were hoping that the shortage of Vodka on board would mean that all the stocks of Russian insect repellant on the train would be put to good use livening up the sadly unfermented orange juice, and for the time being they would be safe.

But no, the train driver had different ideas.

Swiftly he lept from the engine, grabbed some Wodka, and lept back onto the train just outside Moriartys door.
Moriarty left Miss Marple to see what all the fuss was about.......

Owwh.......... come on Moriarty said Miss Marple whats the delay?

Just then, two very large Chinese gentlemen stepped from the next cabin to see what all the fuss was about.............

Moriarty had seen one of them before.

In fact, he'd seen both of them before. He gasped as he realised they were identical in every respect. He couldn't get over the skill they exhibited as they rode their rocking horses down the narrow corridor and through the tiny access into his cabin.

He seemed puzzled. He couldn't place their hideous faces....

Where they were promptly put to the Mortein treatment by a travelling wayward monk of Canadian persuasion....

... Canadian persuasion, of course, is rarely subtle.

The Mortein treatment was administered with the end of the monk's tree-felling axe.

However, these identical Chinese, rocking horse-mounted twins were made of stern stuff (actually they had been carved from the transom of a vessel with which some of us are very familiar - however, we'll abide by the rules and let than one well alone....)

Were they transom estites??...........................pondered Miss Marple??

Little did she know, that the Wongo sisters had been banished from the Factory-That-Builds-All-Things because of their strident support for transom-estitism.

But that still didn't answer the question.....