Thread: Best excuse for not going to work

Originally Posted by fred.n

The boys and I were talking at work today, about the best excuse for not turning up at work for the day.
I heard so many good ones at lunchtime that I thought I'd ask you lot
My best one was from a guy who rung up saying his feet swelled up that much overnight that he couldn't get his boots on GREAT
What's yours???

I was fired the day before .

Reversed out of the carport & ran over the family cat.

Originally Posted by Cliff Rogers

Reversed out of the carport & ran over the family cat.

cause for a celebration if you ask me.

Or in Wongo's case, break out the chop sticks

Originally Posted by Gumby

cause for a celebration if you ask me. ...

Me too. ( we didn't have a cat. )

My stigmata's playing up

Cat reversed out of the carport and ran over me.

A mate of mine was delayed due to light winds in a Sydney-Gold Coast yacht race. He was due back at work on the Tuesday, and as the time to start work came he was drifting off Point Danger.

These were the days before cell phones, so he patched into the phone system through the HF Radphone. Rembember of course that we were all experienced radio operators, and had been at sea a while:

"Hey boss, this is John, look I'm really crook and won't be in today.
....OVER"

Cheers,

P

Originally Posted by Flowboy

Cat reversed out of the carport and ran over me.

You have to have the cuts & bruises to show for that one.

i have anal glucoma (can't see my asre at work today)

I remember a guy at my fathers work, a metal fabrication business, ringing in saying he had lost his contacts and had to go to town and buy some more so he could go to work the next day. The old man, being a nice bloke said ok we will cover your shift but you better be here tomorrow.

The next day he came to work and after lunch he was working on an ornate metal sculpture to go in a brick pillar. It was a sort of abstract star design. He dropped something and bent over to pick it up, in doing so he skewered his eye on the piece he was working on and reflex reaction stood back up and ripped the eye out of its socket. The eye was on this sculpture thing and I think someone even took a photo of it. After the bloke was sedated and about to be wheeled into the ambulance the old man said to him ''Those new contacts did not help much, did they!''

Now he has a great excuse not to go to work.

Pete

Arrgh!! You need to warn people before blurting out things like that!!

My best excuse was falling down a cliff in the Blue Mountains on Sunday around lunchtime and having to be choppered out that night. Didn't make it to work the next day...

The dog ate my car keys and we had to hitchhike to the vet

In reply to my enquiry as to why I had been removed from the electoral roll, I recieved a letter informing me that I had been removed because I was dead. No joke!

I phoned the boss and informed him that I was officially dead and wouldn't be in to work for a week. He said that's OK, he didn't pay wages to dead people.