Thread: What Life Maxims do you live by?

Old age & rat cunning will beat youth & enthusiasm every time.
Youth is wasted on the young.
If it could be incompetence or malice, it's usually incompetence.
You can never have too many clamps

If it works its not broken

You only get out of life what you put into it

Do unto others as you think they might be going to do unto you , but get in first

Trust not and you won't be disapointed

Always cut the longest piece first, then when is wrong you can still get the shorter piece from it.

Always carry two handkerchiefs when you are married, have children or grandchildren.

When sharing a cab with others always sit in the back

Never change a nappie , once they get you to do one they want you to do them all


The trouble with life is there's no background music.


Ashore

If it ain't broke don't fix it

When you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is to stop digging

Amazing! - some new ones for me too.

Keep 'em coming!

Cheers
RufflyRustic

Is it broken?
| |
| No -> Leave it alone
|
Yes
|
Did you break it?
| |
| No -> Leave it alone
|
Yes
|
Did anyone see you?
| |
| No -> Leave it alone
|
Yes
|
You're in the ****.

From my dance hall romeo days :

The early worm gets the bird.

Peter.

Those at the bottom of the ladder always look up to see a bunch of arseh*les.

Let the grudges go, cause lifes to short to get upset over someone's shortcomings.

Originally Posted by silentC

I've always thought there was something a bit weird about that "i before e" rule

Yeap, it is 'their' rule, not ours.

• Due to budget cuts, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.
• I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either.
• I love deadlines. I especially like the Whooshing sound as they go flying by.
• I Refuse To Have A Battle Of Wits With An Unarmed Person.
• I Haven't Lost My Mind. It's Backed Up On Disk Somewhere.
• Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.
• THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE;
1. You believe in Santa Claus.
2. You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3. You become Santa Claus.
4. You start to look like Santa Claus.
• Some days you are the pigeon. Some days you are the statue.
• Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult
• The money is always greener in the other guy’s wallet.
• If We Quit Voting, Will They All Go Away?
• Too many freaks. Not enough circuses.
• She Who MUST be obeyed
• Chaos. Panic. Disorder. My work is done here.
• I thought I wanted a career. It turns out I just wanted a paycheck.
• When money talks, no one criticizes its accent.
• I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
• My reality check bounced.
• I love my cat. My cat does not care.
• If At First You Don't Succeed...Blame Someone Else And Seek Counseling.
• My bank account needs month-to-month resuscitation.
• You're Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me.
• On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.
• I don't suffer from stress. I am a carrier.
• Everyone needs to believe in something. I believe in chocolate.
• Only in America, could a letter offering a million dollar prize be considered junk mail.
• Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the Ark. Professionals, on the other hand, built the Titanic.
• I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
• Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
• A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
• Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
• Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level then beat you with experience.
• If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
• A closed mouth gathers no foot.
• Don't worry about the world ending today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
• A pat on the back is only a few centimetres from a kick in the butt.
• The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
• What if the Hokey Pokey is really what it’s all about?

Originally Posted by silentC

I've always thought there was something a bit weird about that "i before e" rule

I think we should ask Neil for an adjudication.

P

You only go 'round once

Things to see
Places to go
People to do

My personal favourite

One Crowded hour of Glorious Life
Is Worth an age without a name

Studley

Beware of the light at the end of the tunnel, cause it's proberly a train




The trouble with life is there's no background music.


Russell