Thread: Think twice before being too judgemental, and then think again before going to print.

I just found this bouncing around in cyber space



Anyone know who owns it

EDIT by Moderator - this post is a response to the previous post #16.

Keep it on topic please kiddies.

Originally Posted by Big Shed

As we all know, written communication, be it on the forum or in emails etc, often does not convey our true feeling or meaning and can be misinterpreted as there is no facial expression or body language involved.

I have three children all with various levels of Autism and on a genetic and observational basis I strongly suspect that I have Aspergers myself (or HFA if you take the new definition in the upcoming DSM-V). So what, you say?

Well in this regard we are all equal. Body language and facial expressions always were something I ignored, and over the years I have learnt to read the patterns and interpret what they mean- a skill that comes naturally to those that weren't born with the genotype.

Then again, the old adage 'Evil oft hides behind a smile' rings true.... people who can control their body language and facial expressions become highly skilled manipulators, and go on to find great careers in politics or as Hare & Forbes salespersons

In forums, the smileys and and other add-ons can go some way to conveying meaning (irony, humor, sarcasm etc) but it is really the loss of inflection of the spoken word in which a great deal of information is lost.... as well as body language etc.

Here is the danger. People are not thinking about what they are typing- they are thinking about what they are saying and then interpreting to text. It is nobody's fault... many forumites were born before computers became an every day nightmare. The human psyche has to catch up- but I doubt it ever will, as technology evolves logarithmically.

Most people are unaware that speech and text are two different formats and need to be treated as such. This is where the communication breakdowns occur. Once again, it is nobody's fault... don't be offended (unless you work in education, because you should be teaching this to our children).

I for one have to be careful not to make sentences to long, have far too many complex words, or have too many convoluted arguments, otherwise a great number of the people attempting to read what I am typing generally fall asleep half way through and then tell me that I need to write in a less complex and clearer way- I was even marked down for it at uni, but then again I believe it was simply because THAT particular professor was a tool.

Ha! Ha! See what I mean? You can wake up now.

Perhaps most importantly, don't take it too seriously... we are not writing UN peace treaties here!! If you think I am a wanker then you have the right to that opinion, and I couldn't give a fat rat's derriere

The 3 highlighted posts directly above 's were deleted but I have reinstated them as an example as to why some are moderated.

• no real need for them
• waste of space
• add nothing to the discussion
• at least one of them could well have been written by a school kid intent on harassing other kids in face book.

If you have nothing pertinent to add to a thread shut up and leave it to those trying to help.

As said:

Keep it on topic please kiddies.

Neil

PS If you take offence at being called kiddies.... Don't act like them.

I try to read thru my posts before posting them, mainly to check for stuffups but also to check the temperature, so to speak. This is an opportunity for me to reconsider.

One of the things that really annoys me is when people do not read what I have said, and reply to a perceived question. This is a constant problem in all walks of life. I had a number of email exchanges with various people regarding an issue with connecting my network to my HiFi. Long story but I had email conversations and forum (Whirlpool) with at least 6 people, all of whom misread my needs, even in some cases when I had already stated that I had done what they were explaining about and my issue was totally different. I reread my explanations and without resorting to insulting (in my opinion) explanations I had been clear about my needs.

On this forum I was told I had "Broad Brushed Naivety" regarding a specific subject. After trying to elicit some explanation for this statement I quoted every statement I made about this subject on that thread, giving thread numbers so they could be checked. This proved that the only thing I said was that I was not familiar with the subject. The answer was "I did not mean it the way you took it". I could not figure out how else one should take a statement like that. I don't think he was saying "keep up the good work mate". This appeared to me to be someone who was not willing to admit to being wrong. I always strive to admit to fault when I stuff up. This is a subject I have been discussing with a work mate and I could go on about all day. The human propensity for being always right is a survival technique that started when we first emerged from a cave. This however is the 21st century and times have changed. Now this technique is working against us.

I used to use the Renovators forum but have stopped because of numerous problems relating to Qualified persons giving opinions that they are not able or willing to explain in full. Usually they just quote what they have been taught. My opinion is if you don't understand the reason for something then you can easily be wrong. Also I have to say that in my experience tradespeople can have rigid thinking. Not all but a lot of them just stick to what they were taught at trade school and sometimes (often) I have found situations where they were wrong. Mistaught or misconstrued or the mind twisted things around over the years? One experience I often mention is when I had an 'argument' with a mechanic many years ago because he thought I was saying he was lying about what needed doing. (wheel alignment) I finally got him to explain the reason for it. He went down like a burst balloon when he finally realised I just wanted to "understand" the reason. Another bit of knowledge for me. When idler arm is replaced wheel alignment is needed because may be different length to original due to manufacturing or wear. I was 18 years old.

A recent dicsussion about 3 jaw chucks and only using perfect round materials in them highlights this. One reply was "I was taught this and if you don't like it bad luck" No mention of where he was taught it. May have been kindergarten for all I knew. No explanation at all.

Anyway that is the sort of thing that gets my goat but I strive to remain calm and polite.

Dean

Thank you Neil,

At least now I know why my reply was previously deleted.

Bob.

When I saw that my post had been deleted, I knew why, and moved on. I should have made it clearer who the post was directed at (it was directed at sjt) and maybe kept my sense of humous to myself.

I think this thread should be locked and everyone move on, it is serving no purpose other than getting some folks hot under the collar.

I like these forums, I've learnt a lot, and have lots more to learn, got to meet some great people, both in person and via electronic communication , AND have a bit of fun along the way.

Life is waaaaay too short to be too serious and get wound up about little stuff.

Originally Posted by ozhunter

When I saw that my post had been deleted, I knew why, and moved on. I should have made it clearer who the post was directed at (it was directed at sjt) and maybe kept my sense of humous to myself.

haha, my post was made in jest and thought your post was most amusing. Do not keep your humour to yourself, that would be a pity

I am not always perfect. I had a major blowup with my supervisor at work during a pointless (as usual) weekly meeting where he proceeded to talk garbage. Its just the way things are run! He keeps talking over me when I am trying to make a point. It got my goat. He took me up to the headmaster for a caning. (not my words) I sat down, and given first dibs at talking by the supervisor stated my issue in a quick short sentence then shutup. The outcome was very good for us both but better for me I think because the boss did not give me a caning, umm telling off. I did agree to trying to restrain myself but pointed out that if the problem did not occur I would not have the need to. A couple of other issues were dealt with too, which were of benefit to us all. Often our suggestions do not reach the boss. It is not his job but if he sees a need he will mention it and that is usually enough to get it done. The person who is responsible for arranging this sort of thing is a tradesperson. He oversees a number of tradies under him and this group is part of the reason for my thoughts on tradies. Nuff said.

I had the support of the whole workforce (15 or so) as this particular supervisor is not respected by anyone who really knows him. I was told by one workmate that it is pointless arguing with an idiot as he will just drag you down to his level. This is the attitude of everyone including our direct manager and other supervisors.

Dean

Thanks for your thoughts and comments people.

Looks like this thread has reached a conclusion.

Move on.

Neil