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Thread: So very sad....

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2011
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    Default So very sad....

    Hi,

    One of the teachers at my boys school has lost her baby at 35 weeks today. She has been such an important part of my boys development and is also a good friend. I want to give her something but don't want to give flowers. Any suggestions? I really want to do something that will remind this lovely family of the loss that they have had.

    Todd

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  3. #2
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    Sep 2010
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    This is a sad time for this family.

    At 35 weeks it is likely that the foetus was removed and hand and foot prints taken. Maybe a lock of hair if it were long enough.

    Have you thought about box for these items to be kept in?

    This is assuming that the family will want to hold onto these memories.

  4. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
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    Mareeba Far Nth Qld
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    A friend of ours had a similar experience at 30 weeks. They had a "naming" ceremony and cremated the little one and asked me to make a small urn for the ashes which was about one cubic inch. The urn was made from a piece of 50 x 50, 75mm long and finished with a small crucifix on top. The local sign writer inscribed the baby's name and date of death in gold. Perhaps something like that would be appropriate, even if there is no cremation involved. It is sad that this is necessary, but it is still part of life.
    Jim
    Sometimes in the daily challenges that life gives us, we miss what is really important...

  5. #4
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    back in Alberta for a while
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    Quote Originally Posted by toddbron View Post
    Hi,

    One of the teachers at my boys school has lost her baby at 35 weeks today. She has been such an important part of my boys development and is also a good friend. I want to give her something but don't want to give flowers. Any suggestions? I really want to do something that will remind this lovely family of the loss that they have had.

    Todd
    I think the best gift you can give in a situation like that is unconditional comfort and support. and help with the really mundane things.

    For example, a friend of ours had a pre-cancerous kidney removed earlier this year -- a rather scary experience. After the friend recovered, they told us that our offer to visit and walk the family dogs was the best support they recieved.
    I know of many cases of loss where just doing the washing or delivering a prepared meal has been the most appreciated gift from a friend.
    regards from Alberta, Canada

    ian

  6. #5
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
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    Emerald, QLD
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    Quote Originally Posted by ian View Post
    I think the best gift you can give in a situation like that is unconditional comfort and support. and help with the really mundane things.

    For example, a friend of ours had a pre-cancerous kidney removed earlier this year -- a rather scary experience. After the friend recovered, they told us that our offer to visit and walk the family dogs was the best support they recieved.
    I know of many cases of loss where just doing the washing or delivering a prepared meal has been the most appreciated gift from a friend.
    Ditto to that! When I had the same problem a couple of years ago, the thing I valued and will remember most was the daily visits from my ex and my daughter to help out with the things I couldn't manage. Not the same as losing an unborn child but still a vulnerable time regardless.
    .
    Updated 8th of February 2024

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