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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Broome West Aussie
    Age
    67
    Posts
    3,683

    Default Trouble in the cave

    So with the computers dying a thousand deaths and IT gits taking their sweet time (and my money!) I had little to do the last 2 weeks other than sulk in the cave visit quacks in the big smoke and generally annoy the heck out of her bloody highness

    So the other day I wandered out to the stack and cut of a nice length of camphor laurel that was layin there screamin "Make me into a goblet yer git" and so I did... took it to the bandysaw and trimmed her nice and near square (dyslexic eyes dontcha know ) then fronted the lathe and turned it nice and cylindrical... bloody wicked smell that camphor laurel eh? whahooooooooo!!! anyway I turned it down to the round shape needed between centres then took it off and bunged it into the supadupanova chuck thing tightened it up set it on the lathe again set meself up deep deep breathes (first go at diggin the wood outt a peice on the supa nova here mates) make sure the stand thing was just a tad under center of the peice grabbed up the gouge and deep breathe turn on lathe let her wind herself up deep breath again touch gouge to wood


    WIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!! BAM!!! a startled cry from the doorway "OHHH MY FREEKIN GOD" look see missus shelterin around the corner peekin through the open door then wander over to the far corner of the shed reach under the dusty and pick up the now chunked up once perfect cylinder... mmmm not good I thinks

    Notice missus runnin back to the house screaming over her shoulder "CALL ME WHEN ITS SAFE YER DOPEY BUGGAR"... yeah right like thats gonna happen

    So I wandered over and took the supa nova off the lathe and checked it over... mmm still the same... check the peice only a few chunks out of it down the base "yeah I can deal with that no worries" I think to meself and put the piece back in... tighten the buggary outta the thing do a couple of test yanks on the peice nope no movement at all try to tighten it some more put it to the lathe again... same result WIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ BAM!!

    mmmm so I grab the peice from its new hiding spot under the bench go to the lathe get out the screw thing that came with it over to the drill press find drill a little smaller than the screw thing and drill hole in centre thread screw thing on... okay thats tighter than a gnats bum I think to meself and then into the supanova I bung it tighten that up... deep breathe put it on the lathe... turn on... deep breath

    Would you believe it? WIZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ BAM!! again

    Now Im not a superstitious bloke by any means but that was the third time that blasted peice of wood came flyin outta the lathe and this time it went past my friggin earhole at a heck of a rate of knots!!! So discretion bein the better part of valor I decided to make a bandysaw box...

    So I grabbed another peice of timber this time a nice chunk of Mulbury I had just sittin screaming at me "MAKE ME INTO A LOVELY BOX FOR ONE OF THE GIRLS YER GIT" so I did... well I started to... but the blasted cat gut under foot just as I was sending it for its first cut between my legs the damned furball went tail slithering up my strides leg (yer me fiirst thought to dont worry I thought WOW!! me lucks changed!! WHAHOOO but no just the friggin cat ) and I jumped sliced the damned wood totally the wrong way bandysaw screaming cause its blades bent the wrong way and me damned dopey digits comin within a numnuts ion of bein sausage meat!!

    So.... bein the brave soul I am... the true mans man I am known far and wide as... I gave up

    ... and went outside to kick the cat bite the dog chuck the cricket ball AT the kids then waltzed inside snarled at her bloody highness and plonked meself in front of the ruddy idiot box!

    But in all that several things I must have cleared up...

    First what did I do wrong???? Firstly with puttin it into the jaws I mean the peice of cylinder fit into the jaws bloody perfectly... it was tight... it was level... the stand was roughly 1/4in under center... I fronted the sodding thing right by gar! Heck I even had the lathe turned down LOW so... what did I do wrong?

    Secondly with fittin the screw to it and to the lathe it was firm in the timber... the screw was firm in the chuck... but what did I do friggin wrong that it came out?

    Thirdly... I DONT OWN A FRIGGIN CAT!!!! :mad: I hate loathe and detest cats always have always will so... WHY WAS A CAT IN ME SHED???? :eek:
    Believe me there IS life beyond marriage!!! Relax breathe and smile learn to laugh again from the heart so it reaches the eyes!!


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  3. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Western Sydney
    Posts
    234

    Default

    Awww! The cat likes you. Isn't that nice!!!

  4. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Location
    Canberra
    Age
    50
    Posts
    633

    Default

    First what did I do wrong???? Firstly with puttin it into the jaws I mean the peice of cylinder fit into the jaws bloody perfectly... it was tight... it was level... the stand was roughly 1/4in under center... I fronted the sodding thing right by gar! Heck I even had the lathe turned down LOW so... what did I do wrong?
    • What jaws were you using to hold it in the chuck?
    • Did you bring the tailstock up to support the piece until you removed a bit more of the wood or did you hack straight into the end grain?
    • What gouge were you using?
    • Were your tools sharp?

  5. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Canberra
    Age
    54
    Posts
    914

    Default

    Yeah what toasty said and then one more...

    Give the cat some milk ya old phart.... be nice to the moggie, be even nicer to the moggie and put a couple of drops of tobasco sauce in it. Wont hurt the cat too much but you can be sure it ont return!!!

    Pete

  6. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    East Warburton, Vic
    Age
    54
    Posts
    14,189

    Default

    Did ya put it between centres first and put a spigot on the end first cause if ya didn't, it will fly off and the cat was trying to tell ya that I am homeless and will you please give me a home
    Cheers

    DJ


    ADMIN

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Northen Rivers NSW
    Age
    57
    Posts
    2,837

    Default

    Hey dingo

    Whats about we abduct Raffan and keep im in a cage, then we can drag im out on a chain, snarlin and a cussin, to show us how to do it.

    Then back to the cage


  8. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2001
    Location
    forest. tasmainia
    Age
    90
    Posts
    1,586

    Default

    Dingo.
    Not your day for sure.
    p.t.c

  9. #8
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Townsville Qld
    Age
    54
    Posts
    3,132

    Default

    I don't know why and I know some people be able to help you out but I do have to say if that what happens when that cats around my opinion would be to hunt that cat to billyo
    bye

  10. #9
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Wellington NZ
    Age
    72
    Posts
    4

    Default

    Csn fully understand where you are at. Went to shed to make some shavings today, Been raining all night. found shed flooded. Spent most of the day drying out. Started a piece (hollow form) ended up going through and making a designed funnel. Not a good day. Luckily cat stayed out of shed. Must have a good sense of self presevation

  11. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Melbourne
    Age
    65
    Posts
    11,997

    Default

    Lemme guess - black cat? :eek:

    Good idea to go in for the day, some days it pays to take a hint.

  12. #11
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Wellington NZ
    Age
    72
    Posts
    4

    Default

    Yeah you are right but then better in the shed than being directed by SWMBO. And yes the cat is black

  13. #12
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Emerald, QLD
    Posts
    4,489

    Default

    My guess is that it's the angle you're applying the gouge at Dingo. As long as you had a bit of a dovetail turned into your cylinder to match your chuck jaws it should have held fine, UNLESS you hit the gouge in at a savage angle causing some serious dig-in.:eek:




    Or it could just have been that you weren't meant to be in the shed that day!
    .
    Updated 8th of February 2024

  14. #13
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Croydon
    Age
    55
    Posts
    178

    Default

    LMAO!

    Great post mate, been there and done that!
    I've had possums / cats / birds you name it in the shed mainly because I'm too lazy or forget to shut the door.

    The GMC was an almost perfect wood hurling machine, I've had seemingly solid pieces explode into a gazillion bits and also come within a bees tadger of removing digits on the BS.

    I've been out of the shed for a week or two, there are a heap of half finished pieces and I have a lovely bit of spotted gum that is screaming at me!

  15. #14
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Kotara
    Age
    76
    Posts
    196

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by dazzler
    Hey dingo

    Whats about we abduct Raffan and keep im in a cage, then we can drag im out on a chain, snarlin and a cussin, to show us how to do it.

    Then back to the cage
    Last year a gang of us did kidnap Raffan and held him hostage at Grafton for 6 days. Daily we tortured him until he demonstrated another of his techniques then made him squirm while we made him watch us try to repeat what he had done. Is there a better way to learn woodturning than in a hands on class with a master like him? Can recommend the experience.

    Well another gang is going to kidnap Richard Raffan again this October. Another 6 day course and I can't wait. Last time I heard there were some seats left in the getaway car. More information at www.artsfestgrafton.com

    Dingo sorry to hijack the thread, but this is a golden opportunity that I had to share with others.

    P.S. Don't tell RR
    John H
    Why do I never seem to cut "too long"?

  16. #15
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Broome West Aussie
    Age
    67
    Posts
    3,683

    Default

    No worries I hyjack all the time

    The cylinder fit well inside the jaws of the chuck and Id tapered it a bit probably not enough I guess the damned thing just slid out! (mmmm wonder if Im missing something thats meant to be with that chuck? doesnt seem to have any grip on the wood once under spin power)

    ah well... Ive already told her bloody highness that Im going to HAVE to join or at least go gander at them woodturners one night or two at the Bunbury woodturners group thingy

    Well... the furry invader has decided that no matter what we or I... particularily I... try to do to phiss it of its stayin and we and I... and I in particular... can get well lets just say the damed thing has intentions of remaining no matter what I do... chili in the food the kids leave out for it... radishes in the milk... rat traps with "here puddy tat" written on them in catink... nothin works!! the ruddy thing has taken up residence adopted the kids and thats that.... I console meself that the mice population has disappeared since its arrival and thats a good thing eh Actually its not to bad at stayin outta the shed really... as long as I and it see each other it stays outside the doorway if I dont see it or it comes through the other door while Im busy then tough shyte me!! I mean I dont ask for much really I dont just some time in me shed alone tinkerin an makin sawdust thats all just me an the wood and me tools... kids understand that... her bloody highness understands that... so why cant the friggin cat? I mean I dont like friggin cats!! I dont seriously I dont cant abide the creatures... smartass things they are ever noticed that? noses up in the air hoity toity purrr like their bums dont stick an the blighters would whack yer across the noggin at the first sign of weekness!!... cats! uuughhhhh

    JUST STAY THE BLOODY ECK OUTTA ME SHED YER FUR BALL!!! :mad:


    note... I give up this is gettin just way to dangerous so Im gonna get a few lessons!! But dont tell anyone okay? I gots me a rep to think of!!... lets just say Im gonna join for the mateship and company alright?
    Believe me there IS life beyond marriage!!! Relax breathe and smile learn to laugh again from the heart so it reaches the eyes!!


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