Little Johnny went to a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs, rump and chest.

After a few minutes, Johnny asked, 'Dad, why are you doing that?'

His father replied, 'Because when I'm buying horses I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I bid'.

Johnny, looking worried, said, 'Dad, I think the Telstra guy wants to buy Mum.'