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Thread: Family matters

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
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    Default Family matters

    Just posting this so I can gauge, if anyone would be interested in helping me with some helpful advice.

    It's about a family matter that concerns my parents and brother(and now me), and a phone call I received from my father. More like a suttle hint to help sort things out.

    It's nothing life threatening etc, more like a lifestyle threat.

    After a few days of deep thought/brain straining lol, I have come up with no way of not hurting my brothers feelings. In order to obtain a good outcome for my parents

    Anyone interested please add your thoughts, so I can elaborate further within the next 24 hours.


    Thanks




    HJO Was it life or ww that wasn't meant to be easy lol

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  3. #2
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    Feb 2003
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    Garvoc VIC AUSTRALIA
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    Default

    Being too diplomatic can occaisionally lead to misunderstandings.
    Sometimes we just have to say very plainly what needs to be said.
    Good Luck
    Regards, Bob Thomas

    www.wombatsawmill.com

  4. #3
    Join Date
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    Pakenham, outer Melb SE suburb, Vic
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    Default

    Bit hard to follow, HJO, but I agree with Bob in principle, best to say what needs to be said sometimes, can be direct while still showing respect & love.

    Try to do in person rather than on the phone, much easier to get your point across properly.

    Avoid putting things in writing, words & memories fade but letters written in times of stress can come back to haunt you.

    Hope it all works out for the best.


    Regards...............Sean


    The beatings will continue until morale improves.

  5. #4
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    G'day Mate,

    I have no idea what you're talking about so it's hard to offer constructive advice (PMs and email work).

    Basically though, if it's a fight between your parents and your brother, keep out of it - you'll get tarred with both sides. Subtle hints and diplomacy is the easiest way to find yourself attacked from both sides because you can guarantee whatever you say will be misinterpreted.

    However, if you MUST get involved, do it by getting the two sides together, sit them at either end of the dinner table, sit yourself in the middle, and be the UMPIRE. Let them hammer it out, but you act to keep it clean and to make sure both sides have their say. It could be hard not to take sides though.

    Of course, seeing I don't what you're talking about, I could be miles off target ... which is cool, I'm used to that.

    Richard

  6. #5
    Join Date
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    Drop Bear Capital of Gippsland (Lang Lang) Vic Australia
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    Default

    We are about to enter a family dispute over my wifes Fathers medals.
    This week her half brother died, he was 90 and people at that age have a habit of doing these things, but, her Father died when she was 9 and the half brother who just died was not the son of her Father.
    When wifes father died half brother took the medals, they were not beqeathed to him.
    She now wants them as she is the only surviving family member but late half brothers son wants them.
    Without getting into a family ##### fight I am at a loss as to what to do, apart from a visit to a solicitor.
    Wifes Father was in the first landing at Gallipolli and it does mean somnething to her.
    Doesn't help you I know but this is what we are up against and letting you know that we sort of know how you may feel.
    Stupidity kills. Absolute stupidity kills absolutely.

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    NSW
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    Default

    Thanks all for your input

    For some strange reason the part of my brain, that sorts my own family problems out is missing from my head.

    I just rang my parents and the problem is not as bad as it first seemed (whew). So I will not stress you kind members further.

    Ian: Thats one sticky issue, all I can say is I'm sure most half brothers/sisters see there place in the family circle no differently than you do(will leave out all them nasties/infighting that is sometimes part of that kind of relationship) in regards to whats rightfully theirs.

    Now if your grandfather knew about this, he would be one p@$%#%d off man. So do whatever it takes in his honour to settle this in a gentlemanly fashion asap.



    How many green stamps do I need for a perfect world?


    HJ0 Ian No baiting here, just incase you take me the wrong way lol.

  8. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Perth WA
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    Quote Originally Posted by Iain
    We are about to enter a family dispute over my wifes Fathers medals.
    This week her half brother died, he was 90 and people at that age have a habit of doing these things, but, her Father died when she was 9 and the half brother who just died was not the son of her Father.
    When wifes father died half brother took the medals, they were not beqeathed to him.
    She now wants them as she is the only surviving family member but late half brothers son wants them.
    Without getting into a family ##### fight I am at a loss as to what to do, apart from a visit to a solicitor.
    Wifes Father was in the first landing at Gallipolli and it does mean somnething to her.
    Doesn't help you I know but this is what we are up against and letting you know that we sort of know how you may feel.
    Lets hope that the current holder of the medals will see the light and give them to the correct blood line. Good luck.

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